Friday, December 31, 2010

It's just like forty going north...

This year, I wanted to buck the trend on New Year's resolutions by keeping the ones I make.

According to one survey, among the Top 10 New Year's Resolutions are enjoying life more, learning something new and getting organized.

I admit, I really do want to enjoy my life more. I've been described as being way too serious. Guilty as charged. It's seems like all I do is work, work, work. I honestly want to have fun, kick back and relax the way other people do.

Maybe smiling more or laughing out loud would be a good place to start. I know that using humorous metaphors sometimes give me a chuckle.

So, my first New Year's Resolution is to insert a metaphor somewhere in conversation once a day. For example, when I'm particularly pleased, I'll blurt out, "Well butter my biscuit!" When I'm not feeling negative, I'll say, "You don't have a snowball's chance..." Well, you know the rest of that one.

And when I'm frustrated with a certain individual's stubborness [wink, wink], I'll whisper to myself, "He'd argue with a fencepost."

When my schedule is overloaded, I'll shout out, "I've bitten off more than I can chew!" If I'm surprised, I'll exclaim, "Well shut my mouth!"

And at those rare times when I'm being blamed for something I did not do, I'll reply, "You're barking up the wrong tree, Mister."

O.K., well, enough of that silliness, now, back to my old serious self.

I am fascinated with biology, especially cell structure and have always wanted to reread all the fascinating facts in my old college biology book about eukaryotes cells, prokaryotic cells, protozoa, DNA structures and chromosone links.

So my second 2011 resolution is to learn one new biological fact every day. Wow, if that doesn't tickle my fancy, I don't know what does.

I also want to organize the spare room, which has been a catch-all for years. But to do this, I'll need my husband's help. Yeah, right, getting him interested in this project is like getting cold tar to run on an uphill grade in the middle of winter. (Maybe enticing him with a mulberry pie or a foot rub would do it.)

Stop! Stop, enough of the metaphors. Oh, the heck with the resolutions, here's my bucket list for 2011:

paint the shed,

ride in RAGRAI,

run a marathon,

start a non-profit for the needy,

travel to Tanzania with STEMM,

vacation on the south coast of England,

visit my cousin in Holland,

my friend in Brussells,

my sister in Washington,

and my other sister in Utah,

conduct another reading in Vermillion,

compile my second book,

my third book,

and my fourth book.

Whew, this is making me dizzy! Maybe I ought to downsize my list to just one specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and timely goal, like smiling more. Well, pick my peas, I could smile just like a gator at an old-fashion baptism.

[Happy New Year to all my faithful readers. May peace, love and all good things come your way in 2011 and always.]

2010 © Copyright Paula Damon. A resident of Southeast South Dakota, Paula Bosco Damon is a national award-winning columnist. Her writing has won first-place in competitions of the National Federation of Press Women, South Dakota Press Women and Iowa Press Women. In the 2009 and 2010 South Dakota Press Women Communications Contest, Paula's columns took five first-place awards. To contact Paula, email, follow her blog at and find her on FaceBook.

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